If you have ever had the good fortune to go the circus, Cirque du Soleil in particular, you are one of the lucky ones. I have seen two shows, La Nouba and Kurios, and it is like being transported into a land of dreams where the impossible becomes possible.

The Wondrous World of Cirque du Soleil

Awe-inspiring feats are made simple by extraordinary men and women. Bicycles fly, people dine upside down on ceilings, and bodies create towers of statues that change shape before your eyes. The fluidity of movement set to colorful music stirs the imagination.

The truth is that not every circus is going to be so grand. Peanut shells may crunch underfoot. Animals bray in captivity. Crowds make noise, and for those afraid of clowns, they may lose sleep at night.

Good or bad, the truth is that we all have our own circus. It may not come with trapeze swings or tight ropes but our lives are a circus. Our circuses are built on our life experiences — on the lives we meet, on the people we love, and on the folks who challenge us. How will you juggle it all?

The Road Less Taken

Some people face major health problems every day, conditions like cancer, chronic pain, and heart disease. Others cannot afford a roof over their heads. Some people are hungry and cannot feed their families. Others face violence on a day-to-day basis whether from bullying or racism or outright political divide. Their circuses can be unfair and cruel, but they bravely hold up the tent.

We all have highs and lows in our lives. The ones we choose to focus on define who we are.

When you take the high road, you become the ring leader. You take control. You understand that you have choices. There is always a solution to be found, even if it is not the “perfect” one. Nothing is going to stop you from making the most of your circumstances.

When you take the low road, you become the side show. You are locked in a cage set by your own mind. You let things happen to you rather than make things happen.

Stop being a martyr and challenge the status quo. You deserve to take center stage.

Not My Circus, Not My Monkey

The Polish have a saying — Nie mój cyrk, nie moje małpy — that literally translates to “Not my circus, not my monkey”. I may not be Polish, but I can appreciate the sentiment.

How often do people put the weight of their problems on you? How often do gossipers try to drag you into other people’s business or worse yet, stick their noses into yours? It happens all the time.

What you need to remember is that it is okay to stay out of it. I hate to say it, but some circuses put on a bad show. The negative energy they generate can overwhelm you and bring you to focus on less than positive things in your own life. You need to decide if visiting the circus is something that really matters to you.

It is okay to close the curtain on people too, to keep them out of your own circus. You do not need anyone’s permission to keep things private. This is your life. You decide how many acts you want in the show and how many people to invite.

When You Care Too Much

My problem is that I care too much. A doctor I worked with told me that once. You see, *gasp*, I actually wanted to make sure that my patients got the care they needed! I would call them after an urgent care visit to make sure things turned out alright if I had sent them to the hospital or if I was concerned about a diagnosis.

This other doctor wanted no part of that circus. Once the patient left the premises, he was done. He told me to let the primary care doctor or the hospital team take over. The final outcome was in someone else’s hands. Essentially, there was no emotional investment in the patient as a person.

I don’t know about you, but I think a doctor should care. I would never change that about myself. What if the patient never followed up with his doctor? If they never made it to the hospital? If a phone call was all that was needed to put them on the right track? I actually care about the work I do and the people I meet. I blame empathy and compassion.

Be Empathetic, Be Compassionate, But Take No Bull

Empathy and compassion, by definition, make everything your circus.

The ability to put yourself in someone’s shoes, to relate to what they are going through, is what empathy is all about. Being compassionate, moves you to action. While these are good qualities to have, you are unlikely to feel these emotions towards everyone and that is okay. Some circuses may be less Cirque du Soleil and more WWE Smackdown. Not everyone wants to fight contentious battles or deal with drama for the sake of drama.

I have a bad habit of visiting too many circuses. It is inherent in me to help people, but I need to remind myself to act only when it feels right, not just because I feel pressured. My family and friends know I am there for them and am willing to lend a helping hand when I can. My patients know that I give my full attention when I meet with them. That does not mean I have to take on more than I can handle.

Sometimes I go to the circus. Sometimes I don’t, even if I keep an eye out for the monkeys.