Routines can help you get through day to day life but don’t let them define you.
The Routines of Everyday Life
- Get out of bed. Check.
- Exercise – yes, I practice what I preach. Check.
- Take shower. Check.
- Get dressed. Check.
- Eat breakfast. Check.
All the while, I get my kids ready for the bus for school (no small feat!) and head to work where a whole new list of responsibilities unfolds before me like the Dead Sea Scrolls. Check and check.
At the end of the day, I complete any other “necessary chores” and make dinner before heading to bed to start all over again in the morning.
It is too easy to find comfort in predictability. That’s what routine offers, that and the illusion of stability. Relying too heavily on routine can trap you into a fixed mindset though, burying you beneath the weight of what you “should do” as opposed to what you “could do”. It’s hard to grow as a person when nothing changes.
Not that all routines are bad. I’d hate to see what would happen if everyone stopped brushing their teeth (yuck!) or worse, the legal system decided to bend a few (more) rules. Certain routines allow for civilized society. The problem comes when certain routines get in the way of your individual talents and passions.
Assuming the Wrong Roles
I am a mom, a daughter, a sister, a wife, a friend, a pet owner, an employee, a homemaker, a writer, a runner, and a doctor. Speaking of which, what pops into your mind when you hear the word “doctor”? Many people think of someone in a white coat, maybe wearing a stethoscope around their neck. They usually envision a man, someone mature with a speckling of grey or even full-out white hair. Not many people automatically think of a young woman in a ponytail and plain clothes, even if she had won a reward for medical excellence from the American Medical Association.
With me, that’s what you get.
I prefer to ignore society’s expectations and be true to myself. Not to mention that white coats are nothing more than fabric covered in germs. You thought unbrushed teeth were gross?
Preconceived notions cloud our reality. We are not born with these ideas. They are created by past experiences, by the media, by society. Rarely do we sit back and look at the facts, rarely are we brave enough to question why we see things a certain way. Instead, we settle and we fall in line.
I am a doctor, but should I care if I fail to meet up to your expectations? It is my role, not yours.
What Roles Do You Want to Play?
Think about the roles you take on every day.
Step outside of your assumed roles for a moment and take a look at your life. Do your roles match up with your routines? Or are your routines a bunch of hooey that society puts on you? Are you doing things you actually love or are you just going through the motions?
Personally, I don’t regret the roles I take on and I try to change them when I do. What I am not a fan of are the forced expectations. I love being a mom but I don’t necessarily like to go to PTA meetings or cook for bake sales. What I do love is the time I get to spend with my kids. I liked being a doctor until the administrative red tape and jammed schedules burned me out. When I left clinical practice and became a medical consultant, I found a routine that made me happy again.
When it comes to my personal or professional life, doing things the way people expect me to do them can be flat out exhausting. I would rather do things my own way. My roles don’t define me. I define them.
What truly inspires you? Only you can know what makes you feel good inside. Let go of what you think others expect of you and revel in what makes you happy. Define your own roles and join me.