Odds are none of us are going to find a genie’s lamp in our lifetime, especially not one buried in the mysterious Cave of Wonders. Still, how “wonder”ful would that be? Three wishes! Aladdin managed to become a prince, to be saved from drowning, and to release the genie from the lamp with his wishes. In the end, he got his happy ending.

Mental Contrasting

We all have wishes but, sorry to say, not all of them are going to come true. Some wishes are feasible while others are little more than magical thinking. After all, not everything is in our control. Take the lottery. I’m sure you would like to win, but it’s a matter of luck, not skill. Technically speaking, you could buy every possible number combination to guarantee a win, but few people can afford to do that. In reality, each ticket you buy sets you up for a 999,999 in 1,000,000 failure.

If we want to live out our dreams, we need something more than wishing thinking.

That something is mental contrasting. It is a psychological technique where you first visualize achieving a goal but then you challenge yourself to think about the obstacles that stand in your way. When done this way, you are far more likely to stay motivated and succeed in your goals.

WOOP! There It Is!

Gabriele Oettingen, a psychology professor at New York University and the University of Hamburg, has done extensive research on the subject. In fact, she has developed a handy-dandy mnemonic to help you on your way. It’s called WOOP — W (Wish), O (Outcome), O (Obstacle), P (Plan).

I loved the idea of WOOP from the get-go so I dove right in. Fitness seemed like the perfect target.

W (Wish)

What is your wish? Think of something that you hope to accomplish. It can be hard but it has to be feasible. Choosing something that is not in your control, something that relies on sheer luck, is not practical. Instead, try to spin that wish into something that you can act on. Put the power in your hands.

W: I want to exercise more during the week and give myself a real fitness boost.

O (Outcome)

What is your desired outcome? Why do you want this wish to come true? What are the rewards? What will it feel like? Imagine it in vivid detail and celebrate your success.

O: There are so many benefits to regular exercise. Walking gives me a chance to slow down and appreciate the beauty of the world around me. Running is even better, giving me an endorphin boost that makes me feel light and happy for hours afterward. When I exercise more, I am energized. I am fit and strong. I look better in my clothes. I set a good example for my children. I feel good about myself.

O (Obstacle)

What could prevent your wish from coming true? Is it something within you? Are there outside factors involved? Focus on those things that you can control. The deeper you look at what is stopping you from acting (i.e., limited beliefs), the more impact you will have on your goal.

O: I am a busy woman with a lot on my plate. I often put my work and home responsibilities before my self care. Why? Because I do not want to let anyone down. When I wake up, I focus on taking care of the kids, getting them ready for school, taking care of the dog, and doing a litany of household chores before diving into work. After a long work day, I get tired and don’t always have the energy to put in the effort to exercise. When I do squeeze in the time, I sometimes push too hard and inadvertently injure myself. A strained tendon or muscle slows me down and it takes time to get back on the exercise wagon, especially when it comes to running.

P (Plan)

How are you going to overcome those obstacles when they come up? Don’t get too crazy. Think realistically. What can you pull off? Oettingen encourages if-then planning to get you started. If this obstacle pops up, then this is what you are going to do about it. Repeat the plan to yourself. Internalize it.

P: What is feasible, doable, and realistic for me may be different for you, but I started out with these simple if-then plans.

• If I feel like I do not have time to exercise, then I will remind myself how much more energy I have when I am in a regular exercise routine. Having more energy will help me be more productive.
• If it is a nice day outside when I bring my kids to the bus stop, then I will take a walk or run before going back to the house. The exercise can be short or long but it will get me moving. This will allow me to exercise before the workday wears me out.
• If I am going to exercise, then I will take a few minutes to stretch first. This will help decrease my risk for injuries.

All it takes is five thoughtful minutes but can a simple thinking exercise like WOOP really work? It can and it does.

Open Your Own Can of WOOP A**

You may remember me warning about if-then planning in a previous post. If-then planning, if not done correctly, can send you down a slippery slope of wishful thinking and self-sabotage. Think about it. If something is unlikely to happen in the first place (if I win the lottery), the then will never come to pass (then I will go on vacation). You will never do the thing you set out to do.

This is where Oettingen gets it right. She narrows the reach of if-then thinking, making it tangible and real. She throws aside daydreaming and dares you to chase after things you can actually control. By facing your personal challenges head-on, you can make the most of what life has to offer.

Now when I bring my daughter to the bus stop, I feel pulled to the great outdoors. Whether it’s a walk or a jog, I have added 5 to 8 miles per week to my exercise tally these past 6 weeks. If I turn toward the house on a sunny day, my if-then plan kicks into action. I stop, take inventory, do a quick stretch, and take a walk in the park instead. It’s surprising how easy it is to teach your mind new tricks.

What are your three biggest wishes? You may not have Aladdin’s lamp, but you have something better — the power of WOOP. How you build your motivation is up to you.